What can make a good parent?
A good parent is someone who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What makes a fantastic parent is not just defined by the parent 's actions, but also the intention of theirs.
A good parent doesn't have to be ideal. No one is perfect. No kid is perfect either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set our expectations.
Profitable parenting is not about achieving perfection. Though it doesn't imply that we should not work towards that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first the children of ours next. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
You will be an even better parent, if you follow these 10 tricks for parenting tips, and you will steer clear of bad parenting.
Not all of them happen to be that simple.
And probably nobody can do them constantly.
Even though some of these may not be 100 % successful, you will be able to move forward using the tips in this parenting guide.
#1 BE An excellent Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not simply tell the child of yours everything you wish them to do.
The most effective way to teach is showing them.
Human is an unique species in part since we can learn by imitation. We are programmed to copy others' actions, understand them, and incorporate them into our personal. Children, particularly, watch everything the parents of theirs do very thoroughly.
Thus, function as the person you would like the child of yours to be - respect your kid, show them positive behavior and attitude, have empathy towards your child's emotion - and your kid will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show Through ACTION
Demonstrate your love.
There is no such thing as loving the child of yours a lot of. Loving them cannot spoil them.
Just what you decide to do (or give) in the title of love can - things like material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over protection. When these items are given in place of real love, that is when you will have a spoiled child.
Loving the child of yours may be as simple as offering them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also listening to your child's problems seriously.
Showing these actions of love can trigger the release of feel good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals can provide us a full feeling of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the child, will acquire resilience and also not to point out a closer relationship with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Babies are born with around hundred billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive the actions of ours, shape our personalities, and essentially determine who we're. They are "sculpted", strengthened, and created through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be equipped to experience positive experiences themselves and also offer them to others.
But if you give the child of yours negative experiences, they will not have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go on the park. Laugh with your child. Allow them to have positive attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with a positive mind-set.
These positive experiences create excellent neural connections in your child's brain and create the memories individuals your child carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it seems hard to remain positive, particularly when dealing with behavior issues. But it is possible by utilizing positive discipline and avoiding harsh discipline.
Being a good parent means you need to teach your child the morals of what is right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being constant will be the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind when you set rules and implement them. Focus on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And allow it to be an opportunity for them to learn for the future in a good manner, rather than to get punished for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR The CHILD of yours
Let your child realize that you will always be there for them by being responsive to your child's signals and vulnerable to the needs of theirs. Support and accept your child as an individual. Be a safe and warm place for the child of yours to explore from and return to.
Children raised by parents that are constantly responsive tend to have better emotional regulation development, interpersonal skills development, along with emotional health outcomes.
#5: Talk with YOUR CHILD And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Most of us already know the value of communication. Talk to the child of yours as well as listen to them carefully. By keeping an open line of communication, you'll have a better connection with the child of yours as well as your kid may come for you when there's a problem.
But there's another reason for communication. You help your child integrate different parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs should coordinate and work in concert to have a trully healthy body. When various regions of the brain are incorporated, they are able to work harmoniously as an entire, which means fewer tantrums, more good behavior, more empathy, and better mental well-being.
To do that, talk through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to explain what happened and the way they felt developing attuned communication.
You do not need to provide solutions. You do not have to have all the answers to be a good parent. Just paying attention to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using words that are simple are going to help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us want to parent differently from our parents. Even those who had a good upbringing and a thankful childhood might want to change some elements of the way they were brought up.
But very often, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak the same as our own parents did.
Reflecting on our own childhood is a step towards understanding the reason we parent how we do. Make note of things you'd like to change and think of how you would get it done differently in a real scenario. Try to be aware and change your behavior next time those issues come up.
Don't give up in case you do not succeed at first. It will take practice, a lot of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing strategies.
#7: Focus on Your own WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Pay attention to your own well-being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as the own needs of yours or maybe the health of the marriage of yours are placed on the back burner when a child is born. When you don't take note of them, they are going to become bigger problems down the road. Make time to strengthen the relationship of yours with the spouse of yours.
Stressed-out parents are more vulnerable to fighting. Don't hesitate to ask for parenting assistance. Having some "me time" for self care and stress management is important to revitalize the mind.
How parents take proper care of their child mentally and physically can make a big difference in the parenting of theirs and family life. If these two areas fail, the child of yours will suffer, also.
#8: Do not SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, for some parents, spanking can result in short-term compliance which sometimes is a much needed relief for the parents.
Nevertheless, this method doesn't teach the kid right from wrong. It simply teaches the child to fear outside consequences. The child is then motivated to stay away from getting caught with inappropriate behavior.
Spanking the child of yours is modeling to your child that he/she is able to resolve issues by violence. A child who is spanked, smacked, or hit is much more prone to fighting with other children. They're much more likely in order to become bullies and also to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later in daily life, they are also far more apt to result in oppositional behavior and delinquency, even worse parent-child relationships, mental health problems, along with domestic violence victims or abusers.
There are a variety of better options to discipline that have been proven to be much more effective, such as good discipline (Tip #3 above ) and positive reinforcement.
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's the goal of yours in raising a child?
If you're like the majority of parents, you would like your child to do well in school, be productive, be independent and responsible, be respectful, enjoy good associations with you and others, be caring and compassionate, and have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
But just how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
When you are like the majority of parents, you most likely spend https://parentinghowto.com/ the majority of the time just trying to get through the day. As authors, Siegel and Bryson, point out in their book, The Whole-Brain child, instead of helping your child thrive, you spend most of time just trying to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you feel angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what anger and frustration will do for you or your child.
Rather, look for ways to switch each bad experience into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be turned into invaluable brain sculpting moments if you focus on teaching the child of yours, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT By utilizing Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what is currently known by scientists.
To parent is among the most researched fields in psychology. Many parenting strategies, traditions, or practices were scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For best parenting advice for raising a kid and info that are backed by science, here's among my personal favorite science-based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
Making use of medical knowledge is of course not a one-size-fits-all strategy. Every kid differs. Even within the best parenting style, there are able to be a variety of effective parenting methods you could choose according to your child's temperament.
A good example is using spanking to discipline. There are many better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You can choose a non punitive discipline method that actually works ideal for your child.
Of course, you are able to also decide to utilize "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and might still get a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has found us that kids with various temperaments react to the quality of parenting differently.
Those people who are more vulnerable to parenting quality will have much better outcomes under good parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those people who are less prone may "turn out fine" regardless of how strong their parents treat them. But it does not mean those practices are great. These children are merely fortunate. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a possibility with sub par parenting practices when you can use well-researched, better ones?
The importance of parenting can't be underestimated. Taking science-based parental advice might not be the easiest way to parent. It may require much more work on your part in the temporary but can save you lots of agony and time in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good point is, that although parenting is hard, it's additionally very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards usually come much later than the effort. But if we try our best today, we'll eventually reap the rewards and also have nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!